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I tried to hide my enthusiasm. I hadn’t been sure I’d ever see Reece again, let alone see him any time I wanted. We were already into the middle of July, I wondered how much longer he’d be there.
“I looked out the window and saw an exquisite creature,” he continued, “with waves of blonde curls lying here. I had to come make sure all was well, and here we are.”
I realized he laid it on thick, I didn’t care. Still, I wondered when he looked out the window if he knew it was me. Before I could get the words out to ask, a bell went off in my head and I understood something I hadn’t at the party.
“So you weren’t there just to hook up,” I said enlightened.
“Now you’re catching on,” he winked with a smile.
“I owe you a huge apology.” I looked down, nervous to meet his eyes, afraid I’d find judgment there. “I guess I jumped to conclusions and assumed the worst.”
“I know, cold, heartless, typical guy,” he said.
I hoped the night sky obscured my flushing cheeks. He was right. I thought him cold and callous and felt awful for thinking such terrible, unfounded thoughts.
“I guess I’m the cold heartless one, huh?” I stated slowly, cautiously, hoping he would disagree.
“Definitely.” He said with too much confidence and a cocky grin.
I giggled, “You’re not supposed to agree.”
“And I thought you wanted my opinion. Next time be sure to give me the script ahead of time.”
“I’ll make a note of it.”
I enjoyed the ebb and flow of the conversation. It seemed so different than the crude lines strung together by most of the guys I’d known.
“Do you make a habit of playing superhero?”
“Only when I’m not trying to take over the world.”
“How do you know Mike?” Intrigued, I sat up straighter, shifted my legs over and patted the space I made for him on the lounge.
“College,” He answered. “We were roommates this year.”
“And you volunteered to spend the summer with him?” I grimaced. “Eew.”
“He’s not so bad when you get to know what he’s really about.”
“I know all I want to, thank you very much.”
I bent my legs and hugged them to my chest. A thrill ran through my body when he placed a hand on the blanket covering my knee.
“Where do you go?” A hopeful light shined in his eyes.
I smiled a little embarrassed, “I’m still in High School. It’s my senior year.”
“So that would make you, seventeen?
I nodded. “I’ll be eighteen in the fall.”
He twisted his mouth, “Too bad. We had some of the best parties on campus. This year we’ll be in a suite, they’ll be even better. I guess I’ll just have lure you over.”
I bit my lip imagining what he might use as bait. I needed to change the subject and go back to something safe.
“So you’re the same age as Mike?” I asked brushing a lock of hair back behind my ear.
He nodded. “Nineteen. Did you know a two year age difference when you’re dating is ideal?”
I shook my head and laughed. “No. I didn’t. So what is this I hear about you asking around about me?”
At first he looked confused, or maybe surprised, I couldn’t be certain which. “You mean at the party?”
I nodded.
I watched his face intently, looking for any sign of insecurity or uncertainty, finding none. Even his voice was smooth and steady.
He looked down at the ground and smiled, “I wanted to size up the competition.”
“Competition? You have no competition.” My eyes grew three sizes bigger and I covered my mouth when I realized I said it out loud.
He chuckled, not in an obnoxious way like I would have expected. His laugh sounded warm and inviting.
“That’s not quite how Mike put it.”
“Mike is an ass!” I snapped. “He has no idea what he’s talking about.”
Reece laughed again, this time he seemed amused. He reached for my hand and entwined his fingers with mine. His hand, so much bigger than mine, felt warm and gentle. I thought for certain he could feel my pulse through my fingers.
“You don’t have to be so hard on him. He pretty much said though many have tried, no one’s been able to win your heart.”
I narrowed my eyes at him, amused by the pleasant spin he tried to put on what I knew was an unflattering assessment of me.
“More likely he called me the Ice Queen,” I said annoyed.
“He obviously knows nothing about you. If he did,” Reece leaned closer to me and stroked my hair with his free hand. “If he did, he’d know there’s nothing cold about you.”
I swallowed hard as I tried to push back, away from him. Being unable to create any physical distance, I cleared my throat, “How’s the girlfriend doing?”
He caught on, and pulled back. “Ex-girlfriend.”
“C’mon, you are incredibly smooth, even I could see that. Didn’t you call and work things out with her? I’m sure she’s putty in your hands.”
“Are you?”
I couldn’t find my voice to answer back.
He grinned, a sly sexy look about him. “I’m a one woman man. And right now, the only one I want is you.”
I took a deep breath in and had to tell myself to release it. No one ever took my breath away. I wanted to believe him. More than anything else at that moment I wanted to believe he had the same intense and inexplicable pull toward me as I to him.
“You forget. I know you’re only saying that because she hurt you.”
He shifted his gaze down, “After meeting you I realized, only my ego was hurt,” he explained. His eyes met mine again, fire burning in them. “Like you, I haven’t found that special someone.” He paused then smiled deliciously. “Until now.”
“Oh please.” I rolled my eyes feeling very flattered, but totally aware he wanted me to feel that way.
“Seriously.” He leaned in again, this time his eyes were locked on mine. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you. And no matter how much you deny it, I know you feel the same way. You said yourself, your instincts are almost always right.”
“Don’t do this.” I felt panic rise in my chest as I realized he was closing in for the kill. He wanted to kiss me. As much as I wanted it too, I shuddered.
Fear took over. Fear that he would be like the others and not want to stop at a simple kiss. Fear that I’d have to fight him off and ruin the enchantment I felt when he was near.
“I see it when you look at me.” His eyes never wavered. They held mine captive as I could not break the hold.
My teeth chattered before he stopped dangerously close, only centimeters away. Relief swept over me, yet I wanted to reach out and pull him against me, feel the warmth of his full lips against mine. I closed my eyes, willing him to bridge the slight distance between us.
I could no longer feel his breath against my lips. He pulled back, I didn’t want him to. The distance between us grew. It hurt. Like having the wind knocked out of me.
He smiled tentatively. “Are you okay?”
I looked toward the water as I nodded in response. I couldn’t find my voice.
“I frightened you.” He stroked my hair, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”
I could see the remorse in his soft brown eyes as he stood. He would leave if I didn’t stop him. I had to do something. I didn’t want him to go.
“Stay?” I reached up for his hand. My voice cracked, leaving me feeling more exposed than if I would’ve been lying there naked.
“Jenna . . .” I loved the way my name rolled off his lips. Hearing him speak had a hypnotic effect on me.
“Sit down.” I hoped I didn’t sound as weak to him as I sounded to myself. “Let’s talk some more.”
He looked at me warily. “You sure?”
I nodded and tried to dazzle him with my smile so he would know I meant it. He sat back down tentatively measuring
my reaction.
“I want to hear more about you,” I said wishing we could find that nice comfortable give and take again.
“Okay,” he agreed easily enough. “What do you want to know?”
“You’re so different from Mike and his buddies.”
“Judging from your reaction to Mike, I take that as a compliment.”
I smiled. “It is. I’ve known him forever, and he’s such an idiot. But you . . .” I hesitated, afraid to voice what I was thinking. “I can talk to you. Like have an actual conversation. The guys I know, they’re not like that. If it’s not about them, they’re clueless.”
He smiled slyly, “I like to think I’m not egocentric.”
“Egocentric.”
“It means I don’t think the universe revolves around me.”
“I know what it means. It just surprises me to hear you use it in conversation.”
Reece’s face lit up as he smiled, “I love words and books. Unlike most of my friends, I like learning and talking about things. It brings enlightenment, don’t you think?”
“I guess.”
He appeared to be the complete package looks, brains, confidence. There had to be something he lacked. The only negative thing I could find about him so far, was his choice of friends. I didn’t care, in every way that mattered he seemed perfect. That scared me the most, because nothing in life is perfect.
“What else do you do?”
“I work part time for my buddy’s dad in IT.”
“Huh? You mean computers?”
“It’s so much more than just computers. Its software and social networking . . .” He started to ramble on about systems and threw out letters that obviously were supposed to mean something, like SAN and TCP/IP and some other things that got lost in the jumble as I watched with interest as his lips moved.
“Social networking, but you’re not even on Facebook.” I realized my mistake immediately. My eyes opened wide in horror. I let on that I’d been searching for him, and brought my hands up to cover my eyes. I didn’t want to see the cocky look of triumph I knew he’d have.
Gently, Reece pulled my hands away from my face. The warmth and adrenaline that overloaded my system at his touch, left me stunned and awed. I lost myself in his eyes. I couldn’t speak. I realized I never felt more alive than I did at that moment and didn’t want to break contact with him.
“You looked for me,” he grinned with the delight and satisfaction you’d find on a mountain climber after topping Mt. Kilimanjaro. “Don’t be shy,” he laughed. “I’m flattered.”
“And I’m mortified.” If anyone died of embarrassment ever, I would have, at that moment. “I was curious. Obviously I’m not very good with computers.”
“Don’t feel bad. I know enough about how things follow you around to stay hidden in plain sight. But, have no fear,” he smirked. “If you need any help of a technical nature, I’m just a call away,” he patted his chest proudly.
“Is that a threat or a promise?”
“Which would you prefer?” He teased, before he began an onslaught of tickles, and once again brought his body dangerously close to mine.
“Whichever one gets you off me!” I said giggling, clearly no longer freaked out, even though I put up a faux struggle.
“Is that the best you can do?” He teased.
“Stop!” I shrieked through my laughter, “Who’s supposed to save me from you?”
“No one can save you now.”
He was right. Even if it were my will, no one could save me from him. From the way my heart leapt at the sight of him. How already the bright, white electricity generated between us made the physical attraction impossible to deny, and the emotional attraction almost lethal.
I was fast falling. I knew I should make it stop, but I didn’t want to. I wanted to wrap myself up in the manic feeling. I welcomed the sudden fluttering of my insides as I hung on to every word, every movement of his face, his eyes, his lips, as he spoke and laughed. I wanted to give in to impulse, to the part of my brain screaming for me to meet his lips beneath the stars.
As if he could read my mind, a serious look crossed his perfectly shaped face. He stared at my mouth, and then at my eyes. He leaned in just a bit closer.
“You don’t know how much I want to kiss you.”
My heart raced in an erratic rhythm. I closed my eyes for a second trying to decide what to do. As much as I wanted to kiss him, I didn’t reply. Fear paralyzed me.
“I need to know you want it too. Just say it.”
I didn’t understand why he wanted to torture me. Of course I wanted to kiss him, but I couldn’t tell him to kiss me. That would be humiliating.
He dipped his lips ever so slightly, and he was closer this time, so close, when his nose brushed mine I thought I imagined it.
“I don’t want you to be frightened or uncomfortable,” he prodded gently. “Whatever your feeling is okay. Just tell me.”
If I took the chance and believed him I’d be putting my heart on the line. I couldn’t do that. Not with a friend of Mike’s. Not with someone currently residing in enemy headquarters.
I inhaled deeply and summoned all my strength to turn my head and close my eyes. I needed to pretend his image wasn’t scorched into the underside of my lids and that every time I closed my eyes I would hate myself for chickening out of kissing him.
“It’s getting late.” I bit my bottom lip hoping he wouldn’t ask why I freaked out.
“I’ll walk you to your door.” He got to his feet and extended a hand for me.
“You don’t have to.”
His eyes bore into mine. “I’m not leaving until you are back in your house safe and sound.”
I knew I needed to heed the warning. The romantic moonlight made it difficult for me to keep in control. His eyes danced and sparkled like diamonds. If I didn’t go now things could heat up, and I didn’t think I could stop myself again.
I accepted his gesture and placed my hand in his. His hand covered mine completely. Just this simple act sent a flash of heat though my body that singed my spine.
On top of my four step landing, with my hand still in his, Reece cleared his throat and warmed me up with a sly look. “Are you busy tomorrow night? Maybe we can catch a movie or dinner or something.”
I shook my head. How much easier to keep him at a distance so close to my house, where I knew I could just bolt inside. I knew I wouldn’t have to make a run for it though. The fact he backed off the kiss, didn’t force his mouth on mine, no matter how certain he felt I wanted it, I knew he would respect my wishes.
“I have plans with Grace for tomorrow.” I answered.
He narrowed his eyes, “You know this is easy to check.”
“Go ahead. We really do have plans.”
Reece kissed my hand and moved on.
Inside, the silence thundered as I snuck in as quietly as I’d left, not wanting to disturb anyone. Up until I mentioned my plans for the next evening, I forgot all about Grace and that she was spending the night. She had to be asleep or else she would’ve come out to get me.
The moonlight spilled in through the windows, as if a flashlight illuminated a path to my bedroom. I cracked open the door a bit to find Grace sleeping peacefully in the dark. Glad for that, I climbed into my bed and pulled the covers to my chest.
Not having to explain my much longer than anticipated absence to Grace had its advantages. It meant I could lie in bed and think of Reece, until sleep fell upon me. I thought it would come immediately, but it didn’t. I hoped it would come before the fear and trepidation reared their ugly head.
No such luck.
I hated the feelings he brought out in me. I hated feeling so wonderful. I hated feeling so unsure about him. I kept my heart hidden, buried away. I hadn’t let anyone in yet, and if I had any ounce of control I wouldn’t now, not if I could help it, and I really hoped I could help it.
Chapter 5
The night air was sticky, suffocating. I couldn�
�t wait to go home, kick off my shoes and relieve my aching feet. The heavy humidity kept my skin damp, causing my hair and sun dress to cling to me.
Livid with Grace for leaving me alone, I pulled my phone out to check the time. It was almost an hour since she disappeared with Mike for a quick trip through the fun house. Funhouse my foot! (I didn’t for a minute believe she didn’t know he would be at the boardwalk, since coming had been her idea.) I shoved my phone back into my purse.
I offered other suggestions for the evening, like the movies. But Grace declined, claiming to have her heart set on being out in the nighttime air, so I let her pick the venue. As we’re getting ready to leave, her cell phone rang, and it just happened to be Mike.
Coincidence. Yeah, right!
I tried to talk Grace out of meeting him, or at least doing it after she dropped me off at home, but she couldn’t see the harm in spending a few minutes with Mike before we left. That was over an hour ago. And I got stuck trying to not look like a friendless loser amongst droves of people.
I wasn’t sure where they went after the funhouse, but they had to go somewhere. Probably making out on the beach and lost track of time. Boy was she in for it. She wasn’t going to hear the end of this for months, if I ever spoke to her again.
The blizzard of people combing the boardwalk began to thin. I made the decision to leave. I wanted to send Grace a text telling her how sick with worry I was over her disappearance and how desperately I was searching for her. That should ensure she’d feel guilty for the rest of her life if something terrible happened to me.
I reached in my over-stuffed bag for my phone, expecting to find it easily. My hand found a brush and my wallet before resting on the phone. I really needed to clean out my purse. I looked around one last time before calling her, getting more frustrated with every passing breath.
I saw him.
Walking straight toward me Reece had his arm around a petite, redheaded girl. My stomach tumbled and twisted. I squeezed my eyes closed, hoping I’d seen wrong or imagined him. My thundering heartbeat assured me I didn’t.
Regret swooshed through me. I’d lost him. Before I ever had him. I thought back to our conversation the previous night and knew there was no one else to blame. I wanted to kick myself for turning him down. At that moment I would have given my right kidney for another chance with him.