Heart Waves Read online

  “No way.” I shook my head and dug my heals into the ground once I realized we were headed onto the line.

  He laughed at my reaction which wasn’t about to win him any points. “Why not?”

  “I don’t do roller coasters.”

  “Everyone does roller coasters. It’s just a matter of figuring out which ones they do.”

  “Not this one.” I insisted.

  “Jenna, how bad could it be? There are five year olds on the line.” He wore a smirk on his face which made me want to kick him hard in the shin. When he put his arms around my waist and attempted to pull me close, I got angry. He knew how he affected me and he wanted to use his perverse power to get me to do something I was absolutely against. That wasn’t okay.

  “I know you’re afraid,” he crooned, brushing my hair away from my face. “I am too.”

  “How? How do you know?” I asked with alarm bells ringing in my ears, more like an accusation than a question.

  He had a sheepish look about him. His eyes fell to the ground, but only for a second. Once he lifted his eyes back to my face, he appeared just as cool and confident as ever.

  “Grace told me.”

  I took in a long deep breath, feeling every muscle in my body stiffen. And then I remembered I refused to speak to her since the previous evening when she left me to go hang out with Mike. Some best friend. I wished she were in front of me so I could tell her what a traitorous harpy she was.

  I looked back at him with suspicion in my eyes. When had he spoken to Grace? Why? Insecurity flooded my mind and pulsated through my veins. I didn’t like feeling this out of control.

  He sensed something was wrong and pulled me over to a nearby bench. He sat down and waited for me to join him, never breaking contact with my hand. Feeling totally awkward I followed suit, and put Patches down on the other side of me.

  “Grace came home with Mike last night,” he explained. “They must have gotten back after we did. She wanted to be sure you got home safe and sound, since you didn’t bother to answer her calls or texts.”

  “I don’t know if I’ll ever talk to her again.” I knew I didn’t mean it, but I was furious with her!

  “I saw her for a minute when I got home, and asked if you liked amusement parks. That’s all. She said you do but you weren’t fond of roller coasters.”

  I noticed again how he spun the true sentiment of what was said to dilute the impact. I hate roller coasters, Grace would’ve put it plain and simple. And then I felt a pang of envy stab deep into my chest. She went back to Mike’s, she spent time with Reece, and I wasn’t there. And it wasn’t the first time either. Jealousy I’ve never felt before filled my gut.

  He cupped my chin between his forefinger and thumb and tilted my head up so that I would look into his eyes. “I just wanted today to be special, to blow away all expectations and preconceived notions. We were having such a wonderful time. What happened?”

  I shrugged, disappointed, disenchanted. “None of this is real. You’ve been playing me the whole time.”

  “What part of this don’t you think is real?”

  I pulled my hand from his, needing space to think clearly. “All of this!” I stood too agitated to sit and discuss it calmly. “You’ve been searching for my weaknesses. Finding things you can use to manipulate me.”

  I could see in his eyes my words stung, but he managed to keep his voice smooth and even. “Jenna, you might feel better when you understand we’re on equal ground.”

  “Meaning?”

  He reached for my hand again, and I hated that I let him take hold of me so easily. I found it hard to be angry with him, or think of him as the despicable villain I feared him to be, when he touched me.

  “I’m scared too.” He spoke in a soft voice. “I’m not used to feeling like this, wanting to spend every waking minute with someone. Or having a girl keep pushing me away, knowing she has feelings she’s petrified to admit.”

  I wanted to protest and insist I didn’t have feelings for him, but I’ve always been a terrible liar. I looked away and he stopped speaking until I made eye contact once again.

  “I’m walking on eggshells so I don’t say or do something to upset you. I’m not used to any of this. The way I feel about you frightens me. And heights terrify me.” He looked earnest.

  “Then why are you so hell bent on getting me to go on?”

  “It’s symbolic, that together we can overcome the fear. The way I’m hoping we’ll do with each other. In the end I thought this,” he gestured to the loathsome ride before us, “might actually be fun for both of us.”

  “What do you mean you’re not used to feeling like this?”

  He looked mildly amused. “That’s what you heard? I just poured my heart out to you and that’s all you heard?”

  “No. I just . . . I’m trying to understand. You don’t feel like this often, or you’ve never felt like this?”

  “Never.” he answered, seeming off his game for a change. “But I’d rather talk about it somewhere more private.”

  “Do you promise to tell me the truth?”

  He nodded and stood, “C’mon, let’s go.”

  I didn’t move. Instead I narrowed my eyes trying to assess the truthfulness of his words. He looked like something was squirming in his stomach, like he was about to be sick. He looked like I felt. If he had told me the truth, this was the best time to get him on a roller coaster.

  I turned to take in the long train and the track. It really wasn’t as horrifying as most of the other roller coasters the park boasted. If anything this was a step above the one at the boardwalk. Only one little baby step above my comfort level. I could handle that.

  “Are you really afraid?” I asked.

  “Deathly,” he smiled looking cocky again, knowing he won the battle. “But it’s worth having my heart pound through my chest if I get to hold on tight to you.”

  I let out a long, defeated sigh. “I can’t believe I’m letting you talk me into this.”

  Chapter 10

  The line moved quickly. The only advantage I could see in that, it meant the ride ended fast. At least I hoped so. While waiting, Reece put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him. I rested my head against his chest and found we fit together perfectly.

  “Hey my little scaredy cat, it’s going to be fine,” he whispered.

  “Yeah, sure,” I answered not at all convinced as the train pulled into the loading dock.

  I followed him through our individual gate onto the platform. We approached the train and took a seat in the middle, it seemed less scary than being first or last. The cars were small and we squeezed close to each other, which neither of us had a problem with. The sides of our bodies were pressed against each other and his arm hung around my shoulder. I began to realize why Reece had his heart set on this ride and it began to appeal to me too.

  We were instructed to leave Patches on the platform next to us, as we would be returning to the exact spot we left from. The coaster pulled out of the station clicking and clacking as it almost immediately began climbing the steel tracks. My anxiety rose as the tip of the train did, and I buried my face into his chest. Like Reece, I had one hand glued to the restraining bar, the other wrapped around him.

  I tried to keep my breath even, anticipating the drop. It looked like the steepest one came first. I felt the wind pushing hard against my skin, my hair flew behind me. My heart raced and thundered harder than the train on the tracks. The only sounds I heard were screams, not sure if they were mine, his, or a combination of both.

  I thought I’d have a chance to recover after the first drop but the car seemed to maintain the new faster speed. The track curved up, down and sideways. My heart dropped to my stomach, and my stomach down to my feet. Once the train approached the platform I felt a wave of relief. I expected it to slow down and come to a stop. But to my dismay it continued and went around the track again.

  As it climbed, I tried to sneak a peek at Reece. I wa
nted to see if his face betrayed the same horror I felt. If not I’d make sure he’d feel it later. He looked white and closed his eyes tight as we ascended the track again. I wondered if it would be less frightening now that we knew what came next.

  The only bright spot to the second go round was that we survived the first. Knowing that, made it just a bit easier to believe I would get off this crazy thing and keep my lunch down at the same time.

  Once the car stopped and the safety harness released, I grabbed Patches from the platform, stood and climbed out. I made it. I could boast that much. I challenged myself and survived to tell the tale. I stumbled but quickly righted myself, a sense of pride swelling in my chest.

  I looked back wondering what Reece was thinking. He moved slower than I and his first couple of steps seemed off balance. At first he looked uneasy. I wondered if he was going to be sick. We continued making our way out of the exit.

  Once safely away from the ride the smile hit his eyes and lips. His eyes twinkled, his face alight with joy. He wrapped his arm around my waist.

  “How was it?” He asked.

  “Amazing!” I answered. “I loved it.”

  “Me too!”

  “Want to go again?” I goaded.

  “That’s all right. I’ll pass.”

  We agreed we had had enough excitement to last for quite some time. The anticipation of the roller coaster was much worse than the actual ride, and drained both of us. We decided to leave the park and go for a nice dinner at a local Italian restaurant close to home.

  Reece didn’t speak in the car. He didn’t reach out for my hand and he kept his window rolled all the way down. Was that to keep from throwing up? I sat taller and straighter, filled with delight; I handled the ride better than he.

  By the time we arrived at the restaurant, Reece seemed to be returning to his jovial self. He came around to open the car door for me and took my hand in his. I noticed every time he did that he looked down at my fingers, like he expected something to be there.

  We were seated immediately. There were a few other couples scattered about the quaint little restaurant. Although on the smaller side, the dining area was spacious enough for us to enjoy a private conversation without being overheard by the other patrons. No sooner than we opened the menu, the waiter came to take our orders.

  “Thank you. I had a wonderful time today.” I said a smile plastered on my face.

  He narrowed his eyes taking on a look of mischief. “You’re welcome. But it’s not over.”

  “You’re planning on ruining it? What are you going to eat just so you could throw up all over me?” I teased.

  “Funny.” He stared into my eyes. “But now comes the hard part,” he said in a more serious tone.

  I couldn’t envision a dinner being more uncomfortable than letting go and riding a roller coaster. I evaluated his expression, still friendly. I couldn’t imagine what he had in mind.

  “What hard part?”

  “Talking to each other. Honestly.” He explained.

  “I’m always honest with you,” I replied.

  He chuckled in response. “You’re never honest with me.” He took my hands in his and rubbed his thumbs over my knuckles. “I have a confession.”

  “Uh oh.” I didn’t realize I attempted to pull my hands away until he tightened his grip just a bit.

  His eyes fell from mine down to the table and he looked like a shy little boy. “Let me start by saying I’m very sorry. But it was so worth it.”

  I felt my stomach drop like it did on the ride. I went from feeling calm and tranquil to overly anxious and jittery in no time.

  “The amusement park?” I asked sensing this wasn’t at all what he meant.

  He shook his head. “No. Last night.” His eyes again fell from mine to the table and back. “I saw you on the boardwalk. I got Mike to call Grace and convince her to leave with him.” He cringed as he relayed it. “I promised to take you home.”

  “What?” I couldn’t believe what I just heard.

  He cleared his throat. “Mike called me when they left and then the whole scene between Lisa and Brandon happened.”

  My whole body stiffened. Anxiety spread like poison through my brain, straight to my heart. He set me up. And Grace went along with this. I couldn’t believe it. I no longer had anything to say to her. At least nothing nice. I yanked my hands out of his.

  “Just listen okay?” He continued, his eyes large and soulful, his voice soft and reassuring. “I kept an eye on you the entire time.”

  Well that explains the look of amusement on his face when I mentioned my date. As well as his playful barbs meant to unnerve me.

  I felt my face flush with embarrassment. “So I was right. You’ve been manipulating me the whole time!” I shook my head and felt my eyes burn. He was no different. No different than any of the other jerks who lied and manipulated their way to getting me alone. “And you turned my best friend against me to help you.”

  “I really didn’t mean to manipulate you. I didn’t see it that way, but I can understand why you might.” He smiled half-heartedly. When I didn’t respond he continued, “And Grace doesn’t know anything about it. Mike’s going to kill me if she finds out, so please don’t tell her.”

  “Why would he kill you?”

  “He’s really getting off on the way she idolizes him. He’s not used to having someone hang on to his every word. We just yes him to death.” He laughed, attempting to lighten the mood. “The only reason I’m telling you is . . .”

  “You know eventually you’ll get caught.” I interrupted.

  He shook his head. “No way.” He said way too confident, as if the idea were absurd. “I don’t want to start something based on lies. There’s only one way that could go.”

  The waiter came with our food. I didn’t feel much like eating but I felt less like talking. I moved my food around with my fork a lot. Thinking.

  “Why’d you do it?” I finally asked still unsettled but a little curious. “Was it some kind of bet with your buddies?”

  “No!” He looked insulted that I could think such a thing. “I wanted to be alone with you. Someplace other than in your backyard.”

  “I thought we had a nice time there.”

  “We did.” He closed his eyes for a moment, his lips curling up in the corners. “A really good time. But you seem so uneasy and guarded.”

  “So I’m cautious. What’s wrong with that?”

  He looked pensive, as though he were weighing his words. “That’s not you.”

  “And you know that how exactly?”

  “I saw a glimpse of you when we first met,” he smiled at the memory and his eyes lit up, “and when you punched the guy in the face, you didn’t have time to be cautious. And today you were absolutely radiant when you decided to let go and jump right in.”

  “Is that so?”

  “Mmm.” A quiet calm came upon him. “I’ve never seen anyone more beautiful than you, with your blue eyes open wide and the wind whipping through your hair.”

  “I didn’t think you saw anything but the drop.”

  He smiled. The warmth of his eyes and smile traveled instantly through my body. He had a point. The last thing I wanted was to just go with it. I didn’t want to open doors that might leave me exposed. But I could feel he would be worth it. Even if I got hurt in the end.

  Neither of us spoke. We just stared at each other like a pair of love sick teenagers. I didn’t feel uncomfortable the way I usually did when guys stared at me. But he wasn’t just any guy. And he didn’t stare at me like he wanted to ravage me, or with the malice of a conqueror about to covet a prize. He looked at me with adoration.

  “So what now?” I asked.

  “I promise to never lie to you again. You forgive me and make it official,” he said taking my hands again rubbing them gently.

  “Make what official?”

  “Agree to be my girl.”

  I laughed, “Are you asking me to go steady?” I
mocked. “What are we, in the nineteen fifties?”

  He looked embarrassed, his eyes dropped and the corners of his mouth turned up just a bit. His normally olive colored cheeks turned pink. “So I’m a little old fashioned, what could I say?”

  I didn’t have a chance to respond before the waiter brought Reece the check. I felt an ache rise in my chest as he paid the bill. I didn’t want to leave. We were only a few minutes from home, and I didn’t want the enchantment of this day to end.

  As that thought ran through my head, it became clear why he wanted to be somewhere other than my backyard. I would never allow myself to be so calm and relaxed with him. I was on high alert there. The thought of Mike and Reece’s other buddies, Brandon in particular, being near enough to see or hear us terrified me.

  And I did feel safe knowing my parents could look out the window at any moment. It kept both the risk factor and expectation level low. On the other hand, it also meant minimal progression for us. Now home lost its appeal and ranked as the last place I wanted to be as I’d fallen completely under his spell.

  The waiter returned with the change, Reece stood. I followed his lead enjoying his chivalrous nature as he held the door open and waited for me to exit. Before I knew it we were in his car on our way.

  “Why do you look sad?” he asked sounding disappointed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push. We can just take it slow, see what happens.”

  “That’s not it.”

  “It’s not?” He asked in a higher octave than usual.

  “Of course not silly, I just don’t want this day to end.”

  He put his blinker on turned to me and smiled, “We’ll in that case . . . ”

  Chapter 11

  We pulled into the Dairy Queen parking lot. It was crowded, but no more than usual. Again Reece came around, opened my door and took my hand. We walked to the end of the line and stood about five people back from the front.